You're Still Here? Funny. So Am I!

The other day something happened that has been occurring more frequently as my weight drops. Let me preface this by saying that I live in a suburb of Nashville that isn't exactly small, but it is tight enough that most people around here know each other by sight if not by name. It's the kind of place where someone might approach you if they recognize you to ask what the heck that jicama in your cart is and what you plan to do with it.

So I'm in the store and I notice someone doing that not so subtle checking out what's in my cart thing. People who are really big know what I'm talking about. There's a train wreck kind of attraction to seeing what an obese person has in their grocery cart. Sometimes I forget that I've gone from scary big to just thick like everyone else and think that people are still gaping to see what I'm buying. The irony is that being smaller means that I'm braver. I made eye contact and said hi.

I figured that she'd stammer or just walk away. After all, if I become a person to her instead of an oddity, she can't feel comfortable about behaving badly. To my surprise, she came over and mentioned that she's seen me around and noticed that I'd lost a lot of weight. She asked me how much. I told her and then she asked me what I was using. This sort of conversation is still frustrating to me no matter how many times I have it because people can't or don't want to accept that I lost the weight by eating better and exercising. To them, weight loss in the triple digits can't happen without something that has been bought and sold and formulated into a plan. Sadly, I know people who are losing weight and have said they plan to write a book or create some sort of product to sell to others. Why not just help other people get healthy?

I see this all the time when it comes to weight loss and in the past few months as a diagnosed type 2 diabetic, I have seen that big pharma and the health care industry tend to work in the interest of maintenance, but only up to a point. One of the first concepts I encountered when trying to learn to take care of myself was the idea that this is a disease where the individual really does have a lot of control over how things go. That's great. But why not take it a step further and make things like daily testing, prevention and other aspects of our lives something that is accessible without the need to hunt through tons of useless and often contradictory information or fight off people who are more interested in the money they can make than the good they can do?

Having written all of that, I now wonder what my purpose is in creating this blog. Do I want to just tell my story? Is it a help to anyone? I really don't know. Maybe just telling it is enough. Maybe there is someone else out there who will read this and have what Oprah via my friend Jeannie would call an "ah-ha" moment.

So here goes:

I'm not an expert. I can't heal you. What I can do is tell you what I'm going through and give you what tools I've created that have worked for me. Here's the first one:



Monday
Water 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Miles 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0

Tuesday
Water 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Miles 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0

Wednesday
Water 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Miles 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0

Thursday
Water 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Miles 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0

Friday
Water 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Miles 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0

Saturday
Water 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Miles 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0

Sunday
Water 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Miles 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0


This is a chart I made to use to keep up with my water intake and exercise each day. Of course I don't walk or run 18 miles a day or drink 18 bottles of water! It just happened to be how many circles I could fit on the page. So use it in improving health and let me know if you have any questions.

Peace,
jas

Where's My "I Survived The Holidays 2009" T-Shirt?!?

Janunary 2, 2009

It's lucky that I'm alone right now. No, I'm not mad at anyone nor is there any reason for me to be angsty because overall life is treating me well. But...but... I'm hungry and I'm getting "back on the carb and sugar wagon" after pushing my luck micro-sampling the holiday treats from the Harry and David tower my brother sent and for no good reason today I would kill for a grilled cheese.

Will I have one? No. I have been very lucky in that my BGI has not gotten out of the normal range since I brought it down. None of the 71 pounds I have lost have made a reappearance. Hooray for that.



January 4, 2009

Okay, its a couple of days later and I'm feeling better. Sorry for making this latest entry so diary-like. The holidays were not nearly as hard for me as they were some of the people in my DM support group. I'm also blessed with friends and family who are extremely and sometimes almost preternaturally supportive. This makes a huge difference and I am only too aware of how very lucky I am to have these people in my life.

As of last night, I'd lost 72 pounds. Sometimes its easy to forget how losing that much weight can change the way a person looks. There are quite a few people I see on a regular basis who recognize me but probably don't know my name. Over the past few months, especially after I passed the fifty pound mark of loss, someone would compliment me and then ask how I did it. This is where it gets a little hard because in real life I am an extremely private person but I also want people to be more aware of diabetes in particular and the living a better life in general, so I bite the bullet and talk.

How did I do it? Diet and exercise.

Then there's almost always the pause and the incredulous look, followed by, "Well, yeah, but how...?"

"Diet and exercise."

"But..."

"Diet and exercise."

I usually go on and explain that as a diabetic, I can't eat anything starchy or sugary. Rice, bread, pasta and anything high in carbs and/or naturally occurring sugar are not in my diet anymore. I tell them about dusting off the treadmill and rediscovering my love of hockey and football (soccer) and football (football) and lacrosse and movies so that my walks are accompanied by images and stories that inspire me.

That is almost always followed by another "Well yeah, but..."

So I ask them what they are asking me. Then it comes out that they were hoping it was either some new medical miracle or at the very least a magical solution that will work without sacrifice or effort. At that point, I smile, tell them it's just one of those things where you have to decide you're ready and then move forward and that I'll be happy to answer questions and help if they ever want me to.

There is no shortcut. There is no magic bullet. People who do this have either reached a place emotionally where they are willing to change for it's own sake or like me, they have reached an end point where their body will take no more and they either change or sicken and die. To a certain extent vanity could play a part, but this is really more about falling in love with being in your own skin and loving being alive. It's about loving the workouts and loving the change. It sounds like a simplification but some of the simplest things can be the hardest to manifest.


copyright 2009 jas faulkner